cind vii, te intorci mereu.

cind vii, te intorci mereu.

tu cind pleci? ai adormit atit de profund, respirai atit de linistit. si te-am iubit din nou, asa cum te iubesc si las de fiecare data.

ai adormit si eu am atipit alaturea, asa cum imi place. tu si linistea la spatele meu, bratele tale incolacite de corpul meu, picioarele unul intre celelalte.

ai adormit si iarasi cuvintele mele s-au evaporat, furate de saruturile pe care mi le-ai dat in frunte…

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Not in that way

Not in that way

atita liniste, pe aici, da?

povestea asta, de fapt nici nu avem nici o poveste, si nici nu o fost. in fine, situatia asta, trebuie sa aiba un sfirsit. un sfirsit bun, calm si destept.

eu incerc sa nu am timp sa stau si sa ma gindesc la tot. totul este bine, dar ar fi putut fi minunat.

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Title #9

Nu m-a mai tinut capul sa scriu un titlul, dar poate pina la finalul postarii, mai schimb ceva.
Am ajuns astazi la niste ginduri, nici rele sau bune, pur si simplu ginduri. Ginduri despre cum stau lucrurile, la cum roiesc de cind m-am intors, si pacea mea a fost eliberata. Panica s-a evaporat iar eu daca ma simt obosita, dorm. Mi-au venit ginduri despre cum ca trebuie s-o i-au de la inceput. Apoi…

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I know you know.

I know you know.

I am not gonna speak for you, but you miss me. You just do. You can talk about everything with everyone, but you just don’t tell them, that you miss me. But I know, is not just fucking with our each other minds. You’re not that type. And I know that you know.

You don’t talk about me, you don’t show that you care about me. But you do.

And first of all, I will make you accept this to yourself…

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The sad, the fat, the bad.

image

Sam Smith is singing again. And it’s just fine.
I am so mad. So mad. I was. I think I did send everyone to hell.

Not in that way, I was thinking the things will grow.
You’d say I am sorry, believe me, I love you but not in that way.

She just don’t care anymore. She doesn’t love me. She wait for me to get happy and after that to get back again.

Sorry, you can’t be like this.

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Sorry, but I am not coming back.

Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck! FUCK.
I cried. I just fuckin cry every time she talks to me. I returned home. And i died. This feeling, like i don’t know them anymore, like everyone just cry on me on the first day and that’s it, after they just buried under the memories, just some memories. I feel like I lost my person. They want me to act so normal, so me. They talk, they smile, they say things that i just…

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i had a dream,…

i had a dream,…

…where you were fuckin my friend.

****

ați avut vreodată sentimentul, că vi se rupe sufletul? mai ales cînd te trezești după un vis nebun de real în care țipai și iubeai.

dacă voi nu, păi eu da. o god, i feel like shit again. again about you.

fuckin crazy bitch, ar spune Daniel dacă i-aș povesti visul în timpul căruia o să încep a plînge, pentru niște evenimente care sunt produsul imaginației și…

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Somehow, he does…(5)

Somehow, he does…(5)

-You promise me to let me go!So please, leave.

-Let’s just talk, okay?

-No, there is nothing to talk about! You need to leave!

-Why? Are you afraid of me?

-No, i am afraid of myself! I don’t trust myself with you! Got it?

-Can we go inside and talk? Just a couple of minutes.

-Why inside? Here. We can talk here.

I was angry, and frustrated, and sad and everything in one. I was on fire, every time…

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so pick me. choose me. love me.

so pick me. choose me. love me.

Cel mai greu mi-a fost să accept ideea asta. Că eu nu am fost niciodată unica. Desigur, paradoxul, cei care te vor, tu îi respingi iar pe cei care îi vrei tu, ești doar second choice. Dureros dar suportabil, e că, toți m-au uitat. Iar cei care cînd mă zăresc pe cîteva clipe, doar se gîndesc cinci minute la mine.

Nu, nu îmi plîng de milă, eu de foarte mult timp deja am acceptat lecția și nu mă mai…

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